CARRIED 014

On Monday, I came home from a weekend down at City of Hope.

When I walked in the house, I was stunned.

The laundry was folded and neatly stacked in my closet. The kitchen was spotless. The fridge was full of leftovers and lunches from families that had signed up for the meal train.

I didn’t have to shop, cook, think about meals or mess or anything. I just got to breathe, to be present and receive.

It was overwhelming - a state of gratitude that is hard to explain.

Back at work Tuesday, I tried to switch gears. Three days to cram in five days’ worth of productivity. Sales, production, billings, collections. My head was buzzing.

Logan had just had a bone marrow biopsy Monday to see if the chemo had done its job. We knew the waiting would be brutal. We’ve been here before—and I couldn’t stand the thought of Candace having to get bad news on her own, again. I didn’t want to be in Santa Maria.

But while I was trying to press through the checklist, my operations manager stopped me mid-sentence.

“You don’t belong here, Joe.

We got this.

Your strength is needed down there.”

I immediately broke down - couldn’t speak.

I choked out:

“I just don’t want it to fall apart… like last time.”

He looked at me and said,

“It’s a different company now, Joe. We’ve got this.”

He wasn’t just talking about Halsell. He was showing me what BROTHERHOOD looks like.

And that’s what I want to say to you, man to man:

People want to help.

They just need to know you’re struggling. But here’s the part most of us choke on:

You have to LET THEM.

It doesn’t mean you’re WEAK - it means you’re HUMAN.

This is how STRENGTH MULTIPLIES.

We weren’t built to carry these loads alone. PRIDE, FEAR and SHAME keep us from asking, though.

Reflection Questions

1. What am I hiding?

What struggle have I quietly buried instead of letting someone else help carry?

2. Where do I need to receive this weekend?

Not manage or fix—but receive.

3. Who in my world might be quietly drowning?

Who needs me to ask, “How are you doing…No, REALLY, how are you doing?

Homework: Kindness That Costs

This weekend, do one act of intentional kindness for someone else—but make sure it costs you something.

Time. Attention. Energy. Pride.

• Bring someone a meal.

• Watch their kids.

• Text someone something real.

• Show up with a coffee and a question.

Then don’t post about it.

Just do it.

Know someone that could use this kind of support every week?

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